MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY

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Each day I found myself wallowing under the frangipani trees that clustered abreast the road counting each car that whizzed past. An act that had become a life style abruptly .
The surmise were so lucid as it unfold itself gently as days turned into weeks and weeks into months. My mind took a trip down the memory lane that was clouded with pain, betrayal and a chunk of it eaten by bitter lessons.

I found myself reminiscing on the priceless and golden moment I spent with her. Endless tears that knows no bounds thrust down to my cheeks profusely as though its biding passers-by goodbye.

My heart heavy and crying like a chirping of a cricket as I pondered on those lovely moments; there were so fresh as though it took place just yesterday.
The wound was far from being healed at the first few months. Loving her with all my heart, withholding nothing with my sense out of place was insane thing to do.
The love was never reciprocated yet, I got stuck loving someone whose heart was with another; it made me feel ‘Love is blind.’

I showed to her she was irreplaceable and she took advantage of everything; I was stabbed at the back with dagger of betrayal. Breakup text was wrapped in a beautiful and astonishing case and sent to me through whatsapp on that fateful day as rain abated profusely as though it hadn’t rained for years. That day seemed to be different as I laid on my bed helplessly gazing intently at my phone.

Moving on became so hard as though my destiny was tied to her. Months rolled on yet, I couldn’t let go; I opted to do something that seemed impossible to me: to let go of her . she wasn’t looking back why should I continue to hurt myself? Why should I continue to fix my gaze on someone that derives solace in her vomit? As months kept rolling, her thoughts fades away.

A sad thing in life is when you stumble on someone who means a whole lot to you only to find out in the end it was never meant to be.
I was determined to hurt myself no more; to let go and let God, and another door of happiness got wide opened.

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Continue from the last three post

We have had eras of queens, serious women indulged in business and with numerous successes recorded, the queen Amina of Zaria, Madam Tinubu, Moremi, and many others. It is quite unfortunate that these history records are not revered or considered too important.

There is no such thing as old school; when it comes to us women, we must understand that we are a flamboyant masterpiece, a creature made from the very thought of love and support, a flawless representation of sympathy, compassion, hope and a solution. We have no expiry date, our dynamic and mysterious greatness is timeless. We are a mass of love and softness, we are the coolness to the heat of the world, we were created soft to be cushions for comfort, and we were given emotions because we needed to know how every being felt from our fathers, husbands, sons to our daughters as well as our mothers.

Ladies, before you get into the whole whirlpool of marriage or relationships, or even if you are already in one, please realize these facts;

Self- worth; Know your self – worth, this also means discover who you are, what you want to achieve in life, maintain a focus and love yourself immensely for someone who cannot love themselves cannot share love to others, also have your own life figured out first. Majority of us wait on the right man to come into our lives and complement it, we fill our minds up with expectations and at the end of the day if the man doesn’t meet up we begin to emit roller coasters of regrets and disappointment that might eventually turn to hate. When you have encrusted yourself with personal strength, growth and love, nobody can ever take it away from you. Even if they behave badly towards you, it would be their shame and loss and not yours. The end quote to all of this is to always be courageous and kind.

It is very publicly known that the first stages of a relationship is filled with effort from both parties to try and impress the other, which of course is not a bad idea. This is the building phase, and first impression matters, but along the line as time goes on, all of these fades, both parties have become comfortable with each other and their real selves begin to show.

Now most men and women seem to have an issue with this. Relationships are not the colorful rosy lifestyle we watch on television, it is actually a journey, where two stable individuals seek to help one another grow with both parties playing their individual roles as required.

Ladies, life requires you to use your brains, do not dwell on some societal beliefs that a woman should be stagnant in thinking and action. No! that is why we have a brain too, else we would have come as stuffed dolls, to be decorated and adorned without the ability to make assertions or objections about where we want our ship to sail towards. Life is not a joke, and every moment counts. We spend so much time worrying about the future, about our flaws, about how bad things are in the present that we forget to live. A wise man once told me that you see these whole struggle which some people wait for to actually pass? That is life itself, so live it feel the pain, make mistakes and learn your lessons then move on.

Be a good person;Yes! Be a good person. Sometimes we choose to change our attitude as women because we feel that being honest and truthful all the time comes with no gain. So a lot of good ladies have jumped onto the badass train. But do not forget that as future mothers fate has a funny way of twisting our yarns. Be wary of the way you treat people, you might not reap what you sow but if eventually you have kids, be very sure that karma has a really good payback style.Marry a good person, we may not always know a person’s true color,but watch how they treat people, listen to the things people say about their behavior too. Then sift out what you like and measure it with the ones you do not like. Watch how the person you plan to marry, treats people below them, watch how they talk to elders and kids, watch how they behave when angry or happy, listen to the words they say and match it to their actions. Finally be with a person with the same views as you do have.

Now for those of us waiting on a prince in shiny armor, sorry to burst your bubble but there is no such thing as that. Find yourself first, before your prince appears. This prince might be shiny too you know wealth based, but might have a tattered heart. Be a queen, seek a good man with great plans and actions to back them up, and settle for a life of intense conquest and partnership.

The time which we all wait for, the moment where problems do not exist and all our finances and goals have been cleared, doesn’t exist in this life time. The struggle always continues. Every stage comes with its own battle, it is up to you to develop your mindset on how to conquer, by thinking like the queen that you are. Remember, it is how you carry yourself that you are likely to be treated

Friends;It is very important to have friends, but also very essential to know who to befriend. You cannot be friends with everyone, but you can be equally nice to people you meet during your journey through life. Keep a sensible number of friends around who help you grow, who are not just there to crowd you but to serve as pillars of strength and support because of course no man is an island and some burdens we cannot just carry alone. Be supportive to them as well, do not always be at the receiving end.

Your soul: Finally, refurbish your soul, cleanse it with daily thoughts of kindness and forgiveness. The world is a chaotic mess, we all know that and sometimes, we cannot help but get caught up in all the confusion. Most of us escape with lessons and some with indelible scars, but nevertheless we learn. Let grooming your soul be your very goal in life, feed your spirit. Find something to believe in, pray and do not forget to smile for you are a creation from spirit and flesh, do not allow the hurt in life, to scratch your flawless personality.



I only become myself when ever i see you

in my heart

you have taken over me

in such a way there is no space for dreams

and for other desires

this feelings in the heart

this heart full of love

this love of mine

desire you alone

this desire to meet with you

can only make my life livable

if i get to create myself

I’d created myself as tears

trapped in your eyes

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photo credit: youtube.com

each time i see those eyes

i see my paradise

and my heart will be at peace

i am nothing except when i have you

with you i become meaningful

i have just one request

allow me grace the pleasure

a moment to gaze

into your paradise just once

to know what this lonely heart feels

i am without a shelter

i have a refuge only but in you

why is there so much distance

we kept escaping each other’s sight

i asked the moon for your blissful gaze

now come into my life

this heart is like a planted crop

make it sprout….



The moon and the sun are not real

Life and death isn’t either

The breeze can blow as it desires

Even the rain too

Not sleeping and dreaming isn’t real either

Like the flashes of lightening

Everything changes

Humans too

Real is you

when I dream

And when I am awake

You are the only thing that’s real

You are the same in both world



Hey Hadi! I know this letter will stun you; but it’s better I say I didn’t mean to before I get started. Actually I wanted writing a love letter like that of Shakespeare but to tell you the truth I am no match to that extraordinary man; so I decided to check through the google maybe I could get something to copy and just paste, but to my greatest surprise there was not a single content that describe what is between you and I; because of that I decided to pick my biro and write what is but my entire idea.

To tell you the truth, of recent, I have been extraordinarily lonely so much that all I see and hear are but your face and beautiful voices everywhere and in everything I do.

 Few days ago, I sat in the cold lonely night with my right leg on the left one; I tried to shake them but having become stiff, they refused to go sideways as I wanted.

Even though the weather was very cold, the breeze as they found their ways into my nose were very hot and dry; due to the intense cold, I went inside my cozy room, maybe it could help a little.  I lay in the bed facing the ceiling even though I couldn’t see anything in the dark and my mind travelled many kilometer afar thinking about how beautiful you could be in physique if you could be so beautiful in my head. I tried closing my eyes may be sleep could come but it was all futile.

For some moments, I began to see your beautiful face in the dark ceiling. It was as though the sun was penetrating through the early morning dawn. As if that wasn’t enough, you came closer and sat beside me. Everything were being conjured in my lonely mind. 

It was like paradise. You know when others closes their eyes; all they see are but darkness but that is a different case for me. Each time i closes my eyes, all i see is your smiles, your unhesistant laughter and that beautiful flashes of light your eyes produces whenever you blink them.

Of recent, my friends have termed me crazy because each time i spoke with them it’s your name i first mention; if i wanted to describe something beautiful it’s you whom i used as the dscription of beauty. I don’t know whether this is madness, craziness or insanity but what i know for sure is that it’s just what my hearts feels.

To the reason why I decided to write this little piece of mine; Over the last two years my friends have all gotten married and all I have got to tell them is but the stories about you. Even my mother says she needed grand chidren and i kept telling her you are the mother of my unborn children, her grand children: she has gotten impatient that she got me hook up with a lady last week. To tell you the truth, each time i see her i felt like a heavy rock on my chest. Because of these, i have decided to write you this little piece to tell to leave my head and come into my everly outstrectched arms and prove those people who thinks i was a crazy clown how wrong they are to think of me that way. 

I have nothing more to say.. Good Night

Yours future Husband
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