Today I want to write on something very delicate, something I know one day I will surely account for. But what can I do? I am just a helpless soul seeking for answers. 

For those who may end up misunderstanding this after reading it, I want to make it clear that I am a full believer of God in all ramifications. Both the body and soul of mine is devoted to the service of God.

That aside, recently the way I see the world makes me think I am either losing or might lose soon. I don’t know what kind of game it is but I’m pretty sure it is a game.

You know if you are a devoted Muslim, Christian, Buddhist, Hindu, or any faith, you must have been briefed on all rulings concerning your dealings in life. Rules like no drinking, no sex before marriage, no smoking and other form of social, moral and religious vices.

Without dawdling, let me go straight to the point; I am just a poor young man looking for answers, and I will be wrong to say God has betrayed me. In short it is blasphemy to say such a thing as a believer because He, God plans better than all of us and that’s what we believe.

A poor little thing as I am, who does not smoke, drink nor womanize, I mean I don’t partake in all those moral vices maybe because of the fear of eternal punishment from God and that fear has no doubt trapped me in the thoughts of whether I am deceiving myself or someone else is!

At times I would sit under the tree at the back of my house and the thoughts that would make me think of myself as either a saint or something of the likes would run riot through my head. Who would blame? You? or someone somewhere?  I don’t think someone would.

I have no achievement, no money, no fames yet those rules I follows says it was the way to attaining the fame, wealth and achievements.

I know and I have few friends who drinks, smoke and who can not stay a day without sleeping with different girls. He does everything and doesn’t care about rules. In spite of all these, He is famous, rich, and enjoying a flamboyant life that I do not have.  He does not care about these rules that I have imprisoned myself with and everything is moving smooth for him.

This makes me helpless and I begin to ask myself “what if we are wrong” I mean what if I am wrong? What if one dies tomorrow and finds out there isn’t God at all and that everything was man made? Does it mean such person like me has lost?

Ok let’s look at it the other way; what if one die tomorrow and there is that God? By then it will be too late for such person like my friend who doesn’t care about His existence.

“it is better to live and believe there is God and die and find out there isn’t than to live believing there isn’t a God only to find out there is after death’’.

This is so because we need to ask ourselves the question “what if I am wrong?”  A good business man should take a risk that has little or no risk at all and believe you me; there isn’t a business worth transacting like the business of life. 

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